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Black filter coffee, please

Now that I’m about to accomplish one dream, I’ve started dreaming about the future again. Come August it’s time to grow up. Get a job and earn some money. Start saving up and sometime, way down the line, buy my own place. Decorate it after searching the web for inspiration; decorate it the way I want.

That’s why I need to get these assignments done.
My future is the only thing that keeps me going
and the only driving force I have left.

Some days there is neither inspiration nor motivation to go on. I’ve had enough. Six years is a long time. Two bachelor’s degrees and come August I hopefully have a master’s degree. Six years of studying. A ton of words read and written. Numerous cups of coffee. All those late nights. Not that many all-nighters. None I think. However, in 154 days – 5 months – it’s the end of an era and the dawn of a new.

How long is it going to take before someone reacts to that car alarm? It’s been sounding off for about 15 minutes now and I’m starting to believe it’s all in my head. But it isn’t. I swear. It happens a lot around here. Car alarms go off all the time.

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London

Superwoman

This has been one of those days were I feel like superwoman. I can do it all. Live an ordinary life alongside being a superhero. Waking up early is fantastic. I’ve gotten so much done today. Read articles and wrote a few paragraphs of my essay before I travelled to central London. Walked around central; bought tea at Harrods; walked all the way around Buckingham Palace. Just because I turned right and headed down the wrong street, but, it didn’t matter because the sun was shining. I met up with friends for a pint; walked some more before I took a break at Starbucks, just off Regent Street, read a few pages while drinking my Mocha Frappuccino. Then I continued down Regent Street, popped into Boots and bought some necessities, and then finally heading down to the underground. Took the Piccadilly Line, during rush hour, to Hammersmith, bought some food at Sainsbury’s, and then finally took the bus home. Home to eat dinner and watch one episode of the many TV-shows I follow, the rest of the evening I’ll have to spend working on my essay. I had a good feeling about it this morning and it made me a little bit more motivated to get it done. Because today I’m Superwoman. Or, I guess waking up early isn’t fantastic when you’re tired at nine o’clock. I don’t feel like spending hours working on my essay, instead I’m cold, tired and I want to sleep. However, I can’t,there have to be words read and written before I can go to sleep. Besides, Superwoman doesn’t go to bed at nine anyway!

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Procrastination

Here’s the thing: I’m supposed to be writing my 2500 word essay which is due on Friday. Instead I’ve cleaned the bathroom, vacuum and dusted my bedroom; finished watching the movie I started last night; watched an episode of House of Cards; then went down to the local shop and bought Pepsi Max, 3 Kinder Chocolate bars, a bag of popcorn, a Capri-Sonne, and a small bag of mixed root vegetable crisps. It’s not like I haven’t written anything. I just don’t know where to go from here. Instead, I’m procrastinating. I’ve read one article and now I feel like taking another break. Watch another episode of House of Cards. I’m starting to see the problem with Netflix. The problem with Netflix is that the next episode will start in x seconds and I’m not fast enough and the episode has started before I reach the computer. So I let it play.

Now, that I’ve actually managed to drag myself up from the comfort of my bed and sit in front my computer, there’s so much I have to check before I can start writing. Tidy up my e-mail inbox, check Facebook, the news, Twitter, We Heart It, or what I really want to is crawl up under the blanket with a cup of tea and read one of the books I treated myself to yesterday. Going in to a Waterstone’s just to have a look is never a good idea. First of all, I spend too long just looking at the books. Second, I can never decide which ones to get. Third, I never leave a Waterstone’s without having bought at least one book.

I’m doing it. I’m opening the bag of popcorn and I’m going to watch an episode of House of Cards. I guess my head just isn’t it in today. At least I’ve written something, it’s basically just needs to be put together and add some paragraphs. It should be fine. And I do write better under pressure anyway.

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Ranting

Do you ever drop eggshells; or garlic; or perhaps a bunch of noodles on the floor while you’re cooking? What do you do? Leave them there and see if anyone else will pick them up for you or do you pick them up and throw them in the bin? Do you sprinkle salt all over the kitchen counter instead of on your food? Do you wipe down the kitchen counter after spilling something? Do you wipe off the grease from the stove when you’re finished cooking? Do you slam the door shut? Especially, when you’re coming home late at night and your flatmates might be sleeping?

Walking into our kitchen is literally like walking on eggshells. Studying at home, my concentration is disrupted by someone coming home and slamming the door shut. I immediately think they’re mad or having a bad day. I was taught that you don’t slam the door shut; you close it. If I start to cook you can bet someone might come into the kitchen and ask me if I’m using the oven [while I’m about to put my pizza in the oven]. My sarcastic voice inside my head wants to reply: of course not, I’m heating it up for you. Oh, you’re having pizza for dinner? Why not just take mine, because your life is so much more important than mine. I can wait. It’s not like I have something more important to do. Out loud I reply as polite as I can: Yes, I’m using it but I’ll probably be done soon. 

I’m so over it. I’m so glad I’m nearly finished with my student days, and the days where I have to live in student accommodation will be gone. Today’s ranting was brought to you by a girl who is tired of cleaning up after other people. But, since I hate cooking in a dirty kitchen I just do it, which Nike told me to.

London

London, baby!

I’m finally here. In London. The capital of Great Britain. I can’t wait to get out and explore more, these past few days has been all about exploring the Roehampton campus.

I can’t wait to travel with the tube again, walk the Embankment, see the Parliament/Big Ben and attend a debate, watch a committee hearing or take a tour inside,  maybe take a trip on the London Eye, walk up and down Oxford Street, take lots and lots of pictures, see a musical or two, see the autumn in Hyde Park, have tea with Queen Elizabeth (albeit that is unlikely), go to Covent Garden and Carnaby Street, visit Hamleys and be a child for a day, go to Piccadilly Circus and the huge Waterstones bookstore, and so on. There are so many things I want to do and there are so many things I’ll make the time to do. It’s good I have the entire year to complete my list.

But most of all I’m looking forward to just seeing London again. The city I fell in love with when I was here for the first time back in 2003. I just knew when I sat on the plane on my way home that I was coming back. I just didn’t know when. I fell even more in love when I returned in 2006 and spent a day in Oxford. Then I returned again in 2008 to celebrate my birthday. Now, I have finally returned to my favourite city and it’s not a holiday. I’m going to live in London for an entire year.

I’m glad I’m not living in the centre of it all. I’m glad I have the option to make a journey into London whenever I feel like it. Just walk around and enjoy life.

London_From_Sky-wallpaper-10379263
Source: Backgrounds (mobile app)
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December 1st, the 335th day of the year. 30 days till New Year’s Eve. January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October and November all flew by so fast. Now, December is here and it’s this year’s last. Soon the year 2013 is over. It goes down in history as the year I changed. I’ve changed in so many ways I can’t begin to explain.

Thick, black smoke comes out from the chimney and rise in the sky. It is barely visible in the dark night. White snow glitters in the light of the street lamps. The wind is getting more aggressive and is blowing cold snow in her face and biting her chin. Stars are shining in the clear sky. For a short moment she imagines herself being somewhere else; another place, same time.

December 1st became December 5th, the 339th day of the year. 26 days till New Year’s Eve. The days since Sunday have flown by. I’ve spent most of the hours since then studying at the library, working out at the gym and sleeping. In between I’ve eaten some food; drunk some water and several cups of coffee. That’s life when you’re a student. It’s not a bad life but it can be pretty exhausting. You feel your powers drain by the minute; your body aches from sitting still on a chair all day. You fall asleep the minute your head hit the pillow. That’s how tired you are. You’re worn out, have pushed yourself too hard for too long. When you wake up in the morning all you can think of is the hour you can go to bed again.

She’s longing for days when she can sleep in. Days when no alarm is going off; days when there are no pages to read or exams to study for. One more week to go; she can do this. Hell yeah, she can do this!?

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Where did the summer go? The weather lately has been reminding more of fall with heavy rain, thunderstorms and wind. And it’s only a short week left. On Friday I head back to university. Two months have flown by, a little too fast if you ask me. But I’m not complaining. I have done so much; worked a lot, read a lot, drank a lot of coffee, saw Hangover Part III, drove around my hometown with and without purpose, went to Krakow with my mother, and made a new playlist. I’ve been to a tons of weddings; making desserts, plating and serving food, cleaning and carrying heavy boxes. I spent two weeks in preschool making new friends. Little people (kids), but nonetheless, I made new friends.

Krakow was amazing. I had so much fun. Good food; good drinks. Cheap beer; good beer. And a lot of shopping. We stayed at Andel’s Hotel the closest neighbor being Galeria Krakowska, a huge shopping mall, and it was only a short walk down to the market square.  It’s been a while since I was abroad. Since I started studying four years ago I’ve spent my summers working. I did a lot of shopping; running shoes from Nike and they’re amazing, clothes, make-up, and perfume.

It’s been a while since the last time I felt inspired. Inspired to write, that is. I’m still not in a writer’s mood. There’s nothing stuck in my head; nothing to write down. Instead, I’ve been reading a lot. And I started running again after a few weeks where my energy level was at the bottom. And my motivation was lacking.  Exercise wasn’t a priority. That changed after I found some new running shoes; that was all the motivation I needed. They had to be tested. My writing is a different matter. A small part of me feels there is something hiding underneath, waiting to see the light – waiting to be put on paper. But every time I’ve tried it only become one sentence or it doesn’t sound good, and it isn’t what was in my head. Instead, I’ve been reading a lot. To maybe find inspiration in others’ work. A lot might be an understatement, the past two weeks I’ve practically been reading one book a day, each book about 400-500 pages.

The plan was to go out for a run but it started to rain. I don’t like to run in rain. It makes me wet; makes the ground wet. So instead I’ll stay inside, drink some coffee, eat some chocolate and read a good book.